Have you ever wondered how a person could possibly ruin orgasms? I mean, orgasms are great, right? How do you take something as wonderful as an orgasm and make it bad? If you’ve ever had those sorts of thoughts or ideas, I can tell that you’re a man. Men find orgasms easily, quickly, and often even a less powerful or overwhelming orgasm is still a good orgasm. I think women love ruined orgasms for men because it’s a little bit like payback for all the bad sex we’ve had. So, let’s get into some ruined orgasm techniques, so you can do a little reparation for all the women in your life who’ve walked away unsatisfied.

What Is A Ruined Orgasm?

You know me, I love to define my terms before we get into the conversation, just to make sure we’re on the same page. A ruined orgasm is any orgasm that is interrupted, lessened, or otherwise not as satisfying as it could have been. I like this definition, because it’s wide, and encompasses a whole lot of different techniques and methods for ruining someone’s O-moment. If you’ve looked at the side bar on this blog, you know I’ve been writing about sex, sexuality, and all this fun stuff for over a decade now. So I’ve been around enough to remember when a ruined orgasm was created through a much more extreme sort of technique than the methods that are popular now.

Less Satisfying Orgasm

Have you ever been so close to cumming that you can feel it? Coiling in your body, tightening, waiting to explode in a wave of bliss, ecstasy, and full body endorphin fueled pleasure? And then, your partner just… stops. Stops doing the thing that was working, stops or slows or fucking pauses to ask if you’re close?! Maybe they change what they were doing, or they finish so they roll over to go to sleep, and you’re left laying there intensely pissed off and frustrated. (ahem) That’s one of my favorite ways to ruin a man’s orgasm, honestly. Top tier ruined orgasm technique right here: slow or stop stimulation right at the moment of orgasm.

Old School Ruination

Back in the day, to ruin an orgasm you didn’t just stop stroking at the moment of orgasm. Oh no, you went a step further and did something extra to make that orgasm spicy! This is why ruined orgasms were often grouped together with CBT. That’s not cognitive behavioral therapy, that’s Cock and Ball Torture. Or sometimes, Orgasm Torture. Closely related to some overstimulation play, the old version of a ruined orgasm involved spanking the cock or balls (or both) at the moment of orgasm. Thumping, squeezing the penis at the head, rubbing strongly at the frenulum or under the head, pinching the tip or blocking the slit, all right at the tip of the orgasm, in order to introduce sensation to overwhelm or subsume the pleasure of the orgasm and replace it with, well, with pain.

Ruined Orgasm Techniques

Now you know some ruined orgasm techniques! Even if your reason for being interested in a nice ruined O isn’t to perform payback to a woman for being bad at sex, you can play around with these methods and see if anything enhances your personal sexual journey. For submissive men, ruining an orgasm as a tribute, or to remind you of your submission (and that your orgasm doesn’t really belong to you), can be a great technique in ongoing D/s or erotic humiliation play. Nothing puts you in your place faster than to have finally earned an orgasm, only for your Mistress to ruin it. You earned ‘an orgasm’, you didn’t earn a ‘full orgasm’!

Your Ruined Orgasm Mistress, Harper

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