There’s a lot of confusion about the terms ‘Cis’ and ‘Trans.’
If you’ve heard these terms you may be an organic chemist, or possibly you were studying the spin of nuclear particles. Or then again, maybe you’ve run across these terms when reading about human sexuality. If you’ve heard of cis and trans in all three circles, then you’re probably well read and a bit confused.
Cis and trans can be thought of as ‘opposites’.
When you’re thinking in terms of atomic structures, to say that a form is trans means that it’s a mirror opposite of the cis form. And, for human sexuality, that definition is actually pretty apt. If you assume that ‘cis’ is the most common or standard format, then when something is trans, it is the opposite form, the mirror image.
The mirror analogy only goes so far, however.
Unlike merely looking into a mirror and seeing the reverse image, a person who is trans looks into their mirror only to see something off. It’s called disphoria or body disphoria. Ok, so, I’ve talked about how your sex and your gender aren’t the same thing, right? How what’s between your legs has no bearing on your gender presentation, or upon your sexual orientation; I know that if you’ve been following my blog for a while that you’ll be familiar with these ideas. If you’re new, welcome, and hang on for the ride!
A cis person is a person whos sex and gender identity match. You look between your legs, and what you’ve got matches up to what you think you should have. A trans person looks down there and what they have, what they see, doesn’t match. Their mirror doesn’t show them, it shows a stranger.
Not really a reverse of a person in the mirror, but a stranger standing there.
Most people are cis-gendered. I do play with gender and with my gender expression, but I am cis. What I have is pretty much what I’m happy with; if we ever get to where we can change back and forth from male to female at will, I’d be one of the first in line for that. But I would be changing back to female on a regular basis. When I look in the mirror, there is no disorientation from seeing a woman’s body looking at me.
The people I know who are trans, when they look into the mirror…
Well, it’s not a pleasant feeling, I’ve been told. Sexual reassignment surgery is the only thing to help people with body disphoria long term. This goes deeper than just wanting to dress up in pretty clothes, be a slut in the bedroom or even having a fascination with femaleness. This is feeling alien in your skin to the point that only surgery and long term hormone therapy helps.
If you’re cis, be glad. And if you’re trans, be glad too. Because you, my darling, are precious, unique, wonderful and amazing. In Native American cultures (pre-colonization), you were sacred. You were called Two-Spirit, and you were honored and treasured. You’ve been given a hard road to walk, and I want you to know that all my hope goes out to you, all my compassion, and all my strength. Be strong, my brothers and sisters, because you are perfect in any form.
I love to learn new things, trans is something that I feel I have always known what it means in a sexual context. Cis on the other hand I did not know what it was. The first time I came across the term was while I was searching for information about asexuality. I came across the blog a man who introduced him self as a cis-male. Me being who I am had to find out what it meant even if for my own understanding, as well as for full understanding of the blog that I was reading at the time.
As for me I identify as cis-male, but I would be right in line behind you if the ability to switch genders ever came about.
If you were looking for information on asexuality, have you found the Asexual Visibility and Education Network? AVEN… They’re chock full of information about asexuality as well as demisexuality. 🙂 They even have message boards.
I once had a really vivid dream in which I woke up transformed into a man. So, in my dream, I instantly jumped into the shower and started to masturbate. Sadly, I woke up before I got to find out what my subconscious thought cumming like a man felt like. lol! Ever since then, tho, I’ve been really really curious.
You are absolutely right, AVEN is chock full of information. I discovered AVEN about eight or nine years ago. Back then the message board was full of closed and negative minded people. A conversation I recently had with Ms Olivia got me to go back and take a new look at it. I was happy to discover that the forums where getting better moderation and the people are at least a bit more open minded. I came to accept my asexuality, or as I prefer to call it, solosexual, many years ago. I developed an interest in sexuality and the many aspects of it during the time that I was trying to figure out my own.
I cant say that I have had any dreams where I became a woman, but I have had energy orgasms and I imagine that is some what close to what it feels like for a woman to have an orgasm. Or at least as close as I will ever find out.
Heh. I heard an analogy once that struck me as feeling very close to the truth. It went like this: when you stick your finger in your ear, which feels better, your finger or your ear? There is a definite difference between feeling engulfed in another person’s body and being the one doing the engulfing. 😉
I’ve had energy orgasms, too, Forrest, and they feel differently from physical orgasms… and even clitoral and vaginal orgasms feel different from each other. Of course, I’ve also cum from anal intercourse, which, again, different sensations… An orgasm for every mood! lol
I sympathize with you, about figuring out one’s own sexuality… it’s so confusing, and if we just had better sex ed, or a more open and understanding society, it would be so much easier. So simple, on the surface, but underneath there’s all this confusion and messiness that comes with being human. We are complex creatures, so it makes sense that our sexuality would be correspondingly complex.
I have also heard that analogy, although you go a bit deeper than what I had originally heard. I also read once that men are capable of two kinds of orgasms and that women are capable of seven kinds of orgasms. I thank you for the explanation.
And yes I agree, people need to be much more open about sex and sexuality. It would make many things in life far less complicated. One of the things I love about the LDW empire is the openness, honesty and respect everyone has for one another.
I really do love the community we’ve built up in LDW: it’s literally possible to find someone to meet any need, fulfill any fantasy. And the level of education and understanding about sexuality is simply staggering here! I love that there are so many smart women and men coming together to have solid, in depth discussions about sex and sexuality.
(Seven kinds of orgasms? dayum. I knew I liked sex, but I didn’t realize it was that good! lol!!!)