If you’ve ever played around with cross dressing, or experimented with wearing panties, then you know exactly what a sissy purge is. But, for the sake of this blog, let’s say you have no idea what a sissy purge is, and would like to know more. In short, a sissy purge occurs when a crossdresser or pantie wearing fetishist has a moment of fear, doubt, and uncertainty, and throws away all their frilly feminine things in order to attempt to push themselves into “proper” masculine dress and behavior. The sissy purge is super common, and definitely tragic. And I have a few tips on avoiding the sissy purge!

Have you ever purged?

Avoid the Sissy Purge Harper 800 601 7259It’s very common for those who indulge in the sissification fetish to fall prey to the urge to purge. For many people socialized and raised to be masculine in Western society, anything that smacks of feminine behavior is utterly forbidden. This deep taboo does help make the sissy fetish a lot of fun to play with (as you already know, anything super off limits in our culture becomes so titillating and arousing for erotic play!), but can sometimes backfire in a storm of recriminations and fear, and that leads to the Purge. You’ll know you’ve purged when you find that you’ve taken all your toys, clothes, and other accouterments for your fetish play and simply thrown it all away. Purging is often accompanied by feelings of panic, shame, and despair, which are relieved by the act of purging away all the things associated with the ‘shameful’ behavior.

How can you avoid a sissy purge?

I wish I could say it’s simple and easy to avoid a sissy purge, but we’re talking about some deeply ingrained behaviors and patterns here, so it’s just not that easy to avoid. Your first step is going to be to recognize that the urge to purge will rise up and attempt to frighten and shame you into adhering more closely to “proper” behavior. When you feel that urge arise in you, STOP. Don’t act on it! This is why recognizing the desire is so important. You need to put a pause between the urge and the action, so that you can change what response you have to the urge to purge. It is normal and perfectly ok to want to retreat from situations that make you feel uncomfortable, so, the desire to purge your sissy side just means that you’ve reached a point of discomfort. You recognize the desire, and then stop, in order to reframe what’s going on inside your head.

Now that you recognize the urge to sissy purge, what’s the next step to take?

The urge arises in response to whatever is going on in your life. Stress, shame, and fear all can make you want to purge. But, you’re aware of the desire, and have successfully resisted! Good for you! Now what?!

Take a deep breath, and then let it out. With a little space between whatever caused your reactive need to purge, and the action of purging, you can now work on creating a different set of behaviors. The desire to purge in itself is perfectly normal, so, first let go of feeling any shame over your instinctive need to dump all the sissy stuff. Next, think about what you’d like to do that’s a little more healthy for you: would you like to react to stress, fear, and shame by creating a situation that induces yet more shame, or would you like to react to the stress with something far better for you. Some things you can do when you’re feeling stressed or ashamed of yourself include exercise (for the endorphins!), a nice massage, getting a mani/pedi (don’t worry, you can have them leave off the pretty colors and go for naked nails, but the process itself feels amazing and is a nice treat), having a restful mini-vacation… Anything that relieves stress, and helps you find your emotional footing again is excellent!

You must respond to whatever brought on the urge to purge, or it will lurk in the background and pounce in a moment of inattention.

Without actually responding to the stress, fear, shame, or whatever else it was that caused you to want to sissy purge, you’ll only delay the inevitable trash day. You have to build a better response to the urge! Work with yourself instead of against yourself, and create a response to sissy purges that is kinder to yourself. Perhaps a limited purge will help make you feel better: go through your stash and toss anything that’s too stained or torn to wear again, or anything that doesn’t look flattering on your body. Perhaps a defiant middle finger to social norms would make you feel better: go buy more sissy things in a defiant fire of feminine fuck you to the patriarchy! As long as you respond in a way that doesn’t further hurt, shame, or belittle yourself, your reaction to the desire to purge can become something far healthier for you.

Pro-tip: the steps laid out to prevent and avoid a sissy purge can be applied to other areas of your life!

Did you know that the steps I’ve laid out here for avoiding the dreaded sissy purge can be adapted quite easily for changing literally any behavior pattern that you may have! Bite your nails? Smoke too much? Eat when you’re emotional? All of those near-automatic unthinking reactions can be changed by using the super simple steps laid out above. In short: recognize the urge, create space between the urge and the action, change the action to something healthier for yourself. I’m not saying it’s easy, but it is simple! Put in the work and effort, and you can quite literally change your life.

Dearest sissies, I want you to be happy, healthy, and utterly yourself.

Embrace all the parts of yourself that you’ve felt ashamed of, or scared of, in 2020! Ring in this new year and new decade by losing your behavior patterns that don’t serve you, and replacing them with healthy behaviors! Your best life is waiting for you.

Your Sissy Mistress, Harper

Fetish Mistress Harper 800 356 6169